i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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