My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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