yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize