so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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