I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
