when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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