so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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