its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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