I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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