I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
