Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize