ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
