i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
