Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
