some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
