is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
