So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
