Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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