i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
We left the knife in your bed.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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