RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Is Oprah even human
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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