I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
