If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
