somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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