i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
