thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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