we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Randomize
