put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
