Non-Jews are for practice
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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