"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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