Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
