That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize
