I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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