this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Randomize
