her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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