I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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