Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
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