Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I intend to get homeless drunk
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize