She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
