That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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