Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize