You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
