I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize