You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize