if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
