I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
