I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize