? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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