she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
