I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
should my penis look like a turkey
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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