she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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