my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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